Just came across a job ad for a Latin teacher.
The post specifies that the ideal candidate must be a native speaker.
A textbook case, really, of “engage brain before opening mouth.”
(Yes, yes—I get it.
Someone probably copied and pasted the requirements from another language job post.
Still, the opportunity is far too tempting not to have a little fun with it.)
Best of luck to them—clearly someone out there believes there is a vibrant community of native Latin speakers, gathering for colloquia somewhere between the Roman Forum and the nearest artisan coffee bar.
Perhaps they have simply been waiting for the right teaching post to come along before ending their two-thousand-year sabbatical.
At long last, a golden opportunity for ancient Romans to dust off their togas, unroll their scrolls—pardon, update their CVs—and re-enter the job market.
One can only hope the interview includes a spoken component, preferably conducted under the stern gaze of a marble bust. Cicero would be fitting. Or Caesar, if we are feeling ambitious.